Novice Journal

A little this – a little that!

Night Mares

on January 5, 2012

For those of you who are “newer” to my blog, let me give you some background here . My twin sister and I are writing a poetry story book called Terra Spar. I think it’s pretty cool. 🙂 Anyhoooo, this is a poem we co-wrote, all about having nightmares (I promise you, this isn’t scary!) So if you get the chance, be sure to check out a few of my other poems in this book !

Characters: Nighttide (in this poem, here’s the horse/Master Night.) He’s our “villain”  so to speak. Solflame: He’s the new king (in this poem he’s the sun/Day.) He’s the super valiant hero. Enjoy the poem!

Night Mares:

He sets the stage at dusk

Dusk, it’s here, its columns dark

Darkened actors wait backstage

Backstage, they stretch and arc

Creatures, all lovers of Night

Night has made an exit right

Right, no left, a cricket comes in

Comes in, to let all begin

Operatic sounds cool the guests

Guests are soothed by harmonies

Harmonies do hypnotize

Hypnotizing sounds, sweet melodies

Acrobats twirl down from ceiling

Ceiling cracked, yet unrevealing

Unrevealed master observes

Observers watch on undisturbed

Leisurely crowd soon finds amiss

Amiss with words sung so sweetly

Sweet turns sour in their veins

Vainly try to run free

Deafening clock begins to chime

Chimes in rhythm, twelve times

Time has come, Night’s at his peak

Peaked mare begins to speak

Nightmares disperse on weary dreamers

Dreamers try to pull away

Away from hooves so cold and black

Black and blue, they call out for the Day

Master Night does battle hard

Hardly pulls back, merciful not

Not an hour too late, the Sun rises

Rising, soon the pain’s forgot

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22 responses to “Night Mares

  1. pixygiggles says:

    This poem really paints a picture in my mind as I read it. Nicely done!

  2. So nice, I wish I could write poetry for my dreams and nightmare to come alive. This old dog has to learn new tricks I guess. 😀

  3. Judy says:

    wow…great poem..!

  4. asoulwalker says:

    Very cool. I like it.

  5. I like it! I’m still twirling around…. 🙂

  6. granbee says:

    Excellent personification work here. As children, we all thought Night Mares gave birth to Sunny Ponies just at daylight, all ready for us to give sugar cubes after breakfast! I especially enjoyed the acrobats twirling down from the cracked celing, yet leaving the Master unrevealed. I think I remember some like that teasing me over my childhood bed! Possibly that line about the crickets might seem “forced”; but I just thought it effected a nice transition into the next phase of the night.

    • mjray926 says:

      Thank you, granbee! Plus, thanks for your second opinion on that line – it’s good to look at things from more than one angle! 🙂

  7. marcofreschi says:

    this is a pretty rad poem, I really like it! thanks for checking out originalpoetry.org

  8. I like it! I’m a very nocturnal person and I’ve written some night themed poetry as well, but not here on WP. Yours is very good.

    Thanks for liking my post “Writers Block!” 🙂

  9. HT Sundance says:

    A very cool concept, and you did a great job on the execution of it. The only line that felt forced was “… a cricket comes in, Comes in, to let all begin …” If I were you, I’d tweak on that line, but besides that, very cool! 🙂

    • mjray926 says:

      Thanks, HT Sundance! I see what you mean about that line…it does sound a little forced.Thank you for the insight – I will see if I can rephrase.

  10. 90dphillips says:

    Wow, so this is the first time I realized these were for Terra Spar -yes, I’m a bit slow haha- you and your sister have such an awesome idea! Poetry storybook. Amazing. Can’t wait til you get it out and about 🙂

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