For those of you who are “newer” to my blog, let me give you some background here . My twin sister and I are writing a poetry story book called Terra Spar. I think it’s pretty cool. 🙂 Anyhoooo, this is a poem we co-wrote, all about having nightmares (I promise you, this isn’t scary!) So if you get the chance, be sure to check out a few of my other poems in this book !
Characters: Nighttide (in this poem, here’s the horse/Master Night.) He’s our “villain” so to speak. Solflame: He’s the new king (in this poem he’s the sun/Day.) He’s the super valiant hero. Enjoy the poem!
Night Mares:
He sets the stage at dusk
Dusk, it’s here, its columns dark
Darkened actors wait backstage
Backstage, they stretch and arc
–
Creatures, all lovers of Night
Night has made an exit right
Right, no left, a cricket comes in
Comes in, to let all begin
–
Operatic sounds cool the guests
Guests are soothed by harmonies
Harmonies do hypnotize
Hypnotizing sounds, sweet melodies
–
Acrobats twirl down from ceiling
Ceiling cracked, yet unrevealing
Unrevealed master observes
Observers watch on undisturbed
–
Leisurely crowd soon finds amiss
Amiss with words sung so sweetly
Sweet turns sour in their veins
Vainly try to run free
–
Deafening clock begins to chime
Chimes in rhythm, twelve times
Time has come, Night’s at his peak
Peaked mare begins to speak
–
Nightmares disperse on weary dreamers
Dreamers try to pull away
Away from hooves so cold and black
Black and blue, they call out for the Day
–
Master Night does battle hard
Hardly pulls back, merciful not
Not an hour too late, the Sun rises
Rising, soon the pain’s forgot
This poem really paints a picture in my mind as I read it. Nicely done!
I’m glad you’ve enjoyed it. Thanks for reading!
So nice, I wish I could write poetry for my dreams and nightmare to come alive. This old dog has to learn new tricks I guess. 😀
Thank you, Spiral Dreamer! 🙂
wow…great poem..!
Thanks, Judy!
Very cool. I like it.
Thank you so much, asoulwalker!
I like it! I’m still twirling around…. 🙂
Hahaha, thanks so much!
Excellent personification work here. As children, we all thought Night Mares gave birth to Sunny Ponies just at daylight, all ready for us to give sugar cubes after breakfast! I especially enjoyed the acrobats twirling down from the cracked celing, yet leaving the Master unrevealed. I think I remember some like that teasing me over my childhood bed! Possibly that line about the crickets might seem “forced”; but I just thought it effected a nice transition into the next phase of the night.
Thank you, granbee! Plus, thanks for your second opinion on that line – it’s good to look at things from more than one angle! 🙂
this is a pretty rad poem, I really like it! thanks for checking out originalpoetry.org
Thanks so much! 🙂 And you’re welcome!
I like it! I’m a very nocturnal person and I’ve written some night themed poetry as well, but not here on WP. Yours is very good.
Thanks for liking my post “Writers Block!” 🙂
Thanks, Chris!
wow ..great 🙂
Thank you, DanIrene!
A very cool concept, and you did a great job on the execution of it. The only line that felt forced was “… a cricket comes in, Comes in, to let all begin …” If I were you, I’d tweak on that line, but besides that, very cool! 🙂
Thanks, HT Sundance! I see what you mean about that line…it does sound a little forced.Thank you for the insight – I will see if I can rephrase.
Wow, so this is the first time I realized these were for Terra Spar -yes, I’m a bit slow haha- you and your sister have such an awesome idea! Poetry storybook. Amazing. Can’t wait til you get it out and about 🙂
Thanks, 90dphillips! 🙂